So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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