we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
