do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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