no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
