no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
