i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I need moral support for this bender
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
