When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
