it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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