if you like me you must not know who I am
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
You left your phone here
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