Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
