lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Randomize
