Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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