no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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