Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
