His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
