you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I am available for nakedness
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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