He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize