ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
