belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
