i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
