the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Watching her eat just hurts me
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
