D3 body, D1 cock
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
