Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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