where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
It's never too late to be topless.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
