we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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