Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
