i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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