we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
