elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
