i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
