don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
