Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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