I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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