I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize