My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I bet he comes in French.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
