Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
