Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
