Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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