I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize