I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
The air was thick with penises
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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