I'll bet she douches with gravy.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
