everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
