So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
