He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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