is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
