Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Apparently you make a good broom.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
