need another drink. this is the easiest way
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize