I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
