Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
