I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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