just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
